The news from When Pigs Fly -- no, wait, make that -- Plastic Bag Farm

For those of you who live to play "Where's Waldo?" what is wrong with the picture below?

Exactly.

My row of initially-reluctant-but-gamely-giving-it-a-try-at-growing romaine lettuce is gone-baby-gone. Courtesy of some cheeky bird if the quasi-surgical pinpoint holes in the ground are any clue.

Little bastard.

Other than that: Farmer Jim got all frisky and planted tomatoes last week. They're dead-baby-dead.

But check out the nifty tomato fortress he's constructed.
No more frozen tomatoes on Farmer Jim's watch.

(Note: He can do things like this because he is An Engineer.)

And look how adorable Farmer Jim's radishes are.

So, of course, inspired by Farmer Jim's initiative, I got all frisky and planted tomatoes this weekend. Our little living room buddies were sending off vibes that life on the ottoman was no longer fun. So, fine, into the ground they went.

They are, no doubt, doomed.

It's so cold here, Bermtopia. So very, VERY cold.

But wait! The great plastic bag tomato fortress!

We ARE a good looking lot, aren't we?

And in case you're wondering, the weekly weather forecast is, you guessed it, cold, wet and dank. I'm not sure those plastic bags will be coming off any time before July 2014.